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The trouble I have with bluegrass in general (outside of a song format) is its intrinsic incessant nature - a lot of it seems quite flat dynamically, no space or rest, and as you say, doesn't really go anywhere or develop. I find much of it a little soulless, especially when everyone seems to be trying to out play each other, and therefore quickly tire of listening to it. However, it is dance music after all, right?
It's a generalisation, of course, and I'm happy to accept my ignorance not having explored the genre in much depth. Molly Tuttle, for example, seems to have soul and a respect for 'weaving what the music demands'.
I'm a big fan of Julian Lage and love the stuff he does with Chris Eldridge. For me it's refreshing to see the smooth beauty of cross picking employed in a freer setting outside the traditional bluegrass confines, with plenty of improvised development and each musician sensitively supporting each other rather than trying to out class.
They do look like they're about to kiss at one point in that video
https://speakerimpedance.co.uk/?act=two_parallel&page=calculator
I get what you're saying.
I prefer to listen to actual songs too. Fiddle tunes can be entertaining for a while, but the repetitive nature gets boring after a while. The concept of guitar competitions is entirely alien to me.
That said, the really great players are able to make the format interesting in almost any context. I never really get bored listening to Tony Rice, Molly Tuttle, Norman Blake, Ron Block or Kenny Smith etc.